Daydreams about the new house

I spend a lot of time daydreaming about my new house and what I'll do in all the different rooms to make it suit me perfectly. One of the rooms I'm having the most trouble with is office. First I don't know if I'll be able to use a third bedroom (a lot of the third bedrooms that I've seen are just too small and only suitable to become a large walk-in closet--which would be fun, lol!) or if it will be in the basement or have to be combined with the guest room or dining room. So that's part of the problem. I can't really decide anything until I know the room's situation.

But even when I think about an ideal situation (which I think would be a large bedroom), I still have trouble. There are some things I know. I'd like to have room for a chaise lounge as well as a desk/work table and bookshelves. I also know I want to put cork on one of the walls to make a super large bulletin board for notes, ideas and inspiration. I don't know what colors I want it to be either. I really like some marble paper that I found at papermojo.com when I was working on my MFA book project, but they're out of stock now and apparently the line is being discontinued. The only other place I can find it online you have to buy 15 sheets for $50. Which unless I want to paper a wall with it, is more than I would use to hang up and use for inspiration for the color scheme. Actually I did think about papering the wall with it, but I can't find my sample at home and I don't know how it would look. Each page is unique so there is no regular pattern to match up. Anyway, the colors in that paper were that really fresh green you see around. I've heard it called celadon, but I'm not sure it's that exactly (again, I lost my sample) and I don't think it's quite a lime color either. Then the green had a swirl of pink running through it. And I'm sure there were other shades of color that I can't remember now. So I'm stumped. I'm afraid to pick out a green like that without inspiration just because that group of colors is so tricky. I don't want to end up with a pukish color or a neon color.

But ultimately what I'm going for is a room that will inspire me to write and I can also use for book crafts. That is a skill that I don't want to lose and would perhaps like to develop. (even if it is expensive). I suppose I shouldn't even call it an office, since that's not really it's purpose. It's more of a creative room. I think I'm going to try and have another space for all my bills/financial/health etc stuff anyway. Keep that negative clutter (I find it negative and overwhelming anyway) somewhere else. Since I have a laptop that should be feasible. I can have a little desk and file cabinet tucked away in the living room or dining room.

Ok. Enough about that room. The next room I was most obsessed with was my bedroom. I wanted to paint a grid of four squares in different shades of blue on the wall behind the bed (I saw that done on some design show) and I was having trouble picking out the colors. But I found a bookmark with three different shades of aqua and blue on it and so I have those colors basically picked out. I'm still searching for the perfect bedspread. I'm going to invest in new bedroom furniture, including a queen-sized bed (yay!), which I know will be dark wood with simple lines, possible a sleigh bed or something similar. I've also decided after seeing some different comforters online, specifically one of Ty Pennington's from Sears, to use chocolate brown as an accent color. So I've actually found a bedspread that's mostly chocolate with a some light blue/aqua threaded through that might work, but of course I can't buy it until I know for sure and I'm not sure it matches yet anyway.

So since I almost have my bedroom figured out, I've now decided to obsess about the kitchen as well. Most of the places I've seen have tiny kitchens, which bothers me because I want to be able to cook. If I don't cook, I know I'll eat a lot of junk and takeout. But I have to like my kitchen. I have to enjoy it. Well, I think I do. I cooked the other night when our kitchen at home was a mess, so maybe I'd be ok. Anyway, if it's nice and updated with new stuff, that's fine. If it's not that's ok too, because that will give me the opportunity to tear it all out and put it new stuff. And I should actually be able to afford it if I use Ikea. And I read in Consumer Reports that Ikea is up there in the ratings. I wouldn't get a couch from them, but bookshelves and kitchen cabinets? Definitely.

My final problem is that I have this nice picture frame and pillow that my previous boss gave me for my birthday in this great dark purple color that I want to use somewhere and I just haven't figured out where they would fit yet. The pillow has muted gold stitching on it and the picture has beige ribbon and pink buttons.

Enough rambling about all that for now. I'm sure I'll figure it all out anyway.

Distractions galore!

I haven't touched my writing recently (not since Labor Day weekend) and while that's disappointing to me, I have still been thinking about SotP (Song of the Prophecy) and I think I'm working things out in my subconscious. I hope I am; otherwise this incredibly long break I've had has no excuse!

Anyway, I've found some new things to be distracted by. Some of them I think are legitimate, while others aren't and I should attempt some discipline.

1. House hunting
   Yes, I'm looking to buy a house or a townhouse. I was promoted to a full time position at work, which barely allows me to afford something in the city. The problem is finding something in a suitable neighborhood. Living by myself will be an interesting experience, considering the fact that I don't like to do dishes or laundry or clean really in any way. lol. BUT I do like to cook sometimes, so that is good. I also like to look at a number of distracting things on line such as: house listings, furniture, paint colors, bedding, Ikea kitchens, decorating advice etc. etc.
   
2. New Television Season
   What is more addictive than Grey's Anatomy? Anyway that's my favorite show I think. Other returning shows that I love include: Desperate Housewives, Veronica Mars and House. Other returning shows that I like include: ER, Bones, L&O: SVU and NCIS. My favorite new show is Studio 60 (please watch so it doesn't get cancelled, it's awesome!) I also love Heros. They come on back to back. How cool is that? I've also been watching: Friday Night Lights, The Nine, Brothers and Sisters and Standoff. Can you way WAY TOO MUCH TV??? I can! I watch WAY TOO MUCH TV!!! And it's even easier now that the big networks have their shows online for free (although Fox does not--boo! and neither does CW, which isn't surprising).
   
3. booksfree.com
   I have always been addicted to reading. I haven't updated my books read list for a while, but trust me it's now a lot longer. This year I've spent so much money on books I don't even WANT to know how much it is. So joined this service that is similar to Netflicks, except that it is for books. You pay a monthly fee and you can check out up to four books at a time, but you can receive and send them back as many times as you want per month. They ship in groups of two so there's a little bit of lag time if you're not careful, but so far it's worked well for me. I think I read six or seven books in October. Anyway, except for the fact that, despite the list that you keep, you can't really control what book you get when (don't put the 2nd book in a series on your list until they've mailed you the 1st), I've been enjoying it. I think I'll read books I might not have read otherwise with this service.

So there you have it. My top three distractions. But not to worry; I had a new idea for a character (I can't believe I actually started with a character) just the other day. My brain isn't creatively dead, it's just resting or something. I think the drive to work on SotP will come back soon enough.

Do you see all the books I've read?

Am I a bookaholic or what? Listed to the side are the books that I've purchased since the beginning of the year. This does not include any books that I have re-read. For example, I read the first two Naomi Novik books twice, I re-read Patricia Bray's Devlin series, and I'm pretty sure I've re-read a couple of other things in there as well.

My intention when adding this list to my blog was to review the books, but I immediately got behind and I didn't want to leave anyone out. Unfortunately, reviewing them all is not going to happen. I wouldn't be able to do justice to the books I read several months ago and I don't have time to re-read them, even though I'm sure I would enjoy it.

But here are some highlights:

Favorite New Authors:

• Naomi Novik

I LOVE this world. Like I said, I've re-read the first two books already and would have the third as well, but I'm not sure exactly where it is right now. I've been trying to get my brother to read them, but he's addicted to video games rather than books so spends most of his free time (and not free time) doing that. But he will read and love them, I promise. The combination of dragons, historical period, and action-adventure is wonderful as well as the author's style, which is in keeping with books written in the period. I CAN'T WAIT until the next book is out. That sneak preview at the end is almost cruel & unusual, since we have to wait so long after these three came out in quick succession. :-)

• Sarah Monette

I don't remember why I picked up Melusine. I think it was reviewed well on locus or something and compared to Jaqueline Carey in terms of orignality and detail. Maybe I'm attracted to "bad boys" or something since both the main characters could be considered "bad boys" in different ways, but I love them both, even if one of them really is a prick a lot of the time. He just doesn't realize he's doing it and then he's sorry. Anyway, I read Melusine in paperback last month then immediately wanted to read The Virtu. Of course the books stores didn't have it. Nor did the library. So i bought and electronic copy, just so I could read it IMMEDIATELY. Even though it's a total rip-off b/c it costs the same as a hardcover (I think, anyway, it was more expensive than a paperback which is much more reasonable). Hello! Part of the reason hardcovers are so expensive is the paper they're printed on and the printing costs. An electronic copy is much cheaper to make. I assure you. So the price should be less. Sigh. Yet I bought it anyway. Wonderful, wonderful books. Again, looking forward to the next one.

This took longer than I expected. I'll try to add more highlights about my reading later in the week. Now, I really should be writing, not letting this blog distract me!

Hit a roadblock, pushed through it

PROGRESS: 14 pages/4,000 words, Ready for Chapter Four

I got stuck less than 50 pages into Marla, Book One. I couldn't decide the best way to handle something, but I think I've got it now. I was writing a whole scene to acomplish one thing. Now, I've folded it into the next scene and I think it moves the plot along better that way.

I wrote a whole scene filled with important information that I almost immediately cut, realizing it revealed too much information. Still, once Nat has suspicions about the villain, I can put the scene back in.

After spending a relatively miserable weekend feeling sorry for myself about various things including my personal life and my job life (and reading a book and 1/2) , I finally got back in the groove and wrote last night. I've been looking foward to writing this scene ever since I thought of the changes I was going to make in it. It's an action sequence and I had a good time writing it.

This scene sets Marla's goal back and attracts the villain to poke her nose in again. :-)

Next: Three scenes that are direct consequences of the action-scene I just wrote.

GOALS FOR THE WEEK:

• Write the above three scenes and more
• Organize writing space in spare bedroom; add bulletin board and dry erase board for notes and ideas
• Continue to think about Song of the Prophecy, especially the addition of a secret society for the Mother or one for each of them.
  

Marla lives!

Ok, well, she doesn't live, but the project does!

I didn't accomplish any of my goals for Song of the Prophecy, but I'm up to chapter three in Marla, Book One. Of course, in my original manuscript Chapter Two is really long, so I'm only about half way through that if we compare. But who's comparing? The manuscript is really too long for the kind of story it is anyway, so I wouldn't mind shaving off a bit of length, say 20,000 words anyway.

So what did I do?

• I cut all scenes not from Marla's POV in the first chapter.
  
• I cut a extraneous sub-plot that doesn't have enough meat to it to be included.
• I made the second chapter all from Nat's POV (my secondary POV character)
  
• I made the villainess more prominent in both POVs.
• I cut a character.
• I made both antognists that Marla meets in Chapter Two more interesting, I think.
  
• I included bits about the new magical system.
  

What do I need to do in Chapter Three?

• Marla needs to figure out what's going on with Nat.
• Some interaction with Byan and Russ? (not sure)

Obviously, since I'm only on Chapter Two in the old version and Chapter Three in the new version and there are seventeen chapters in the old version, averaging 26 pages each, I still have a lot of work to do. But there are definitely scenes that I will be able to use parts of.
Overall I am very pleased with my progress and my enthusiasm so far. I chose to write instead of read on the beach and that's saying something!

Long weekend

So with the 4th of July coming up on a Tuesday, I think almost everyone I know (ok, at least several people) are taking a long weekend. So will I, except I will be working from home on Monday. Unless my parents' condo gets rented in the next few hours, it looks like we will be going down to the beach.

Obviously, I will need to buy some more books to read on the actual beach because I like to keep my computer away from sun, water and especially sand whenever I can help it. =) I can write long-hand in notebooks, but I can't even revise pages because of the wind. That's ok. I need some time to relax and do what I want (which right now includes reading and playing sudoku--both addictive activities).

However, I'm hoping over this five day stretch I can also get a good start on the revision of both my books. Maybe it's good that I have two to work on. They're very different, after all, so I shouldn't confuse them in my mind or anything like that. Then, if I get tired of working on one, I can switch to the other. I have a hard time doing that when actually writing because it requires a switch in voice and characters' heads and stuff like that, but that shouldn't be as much of a problem with revision. Anyway, we'll see how it goes. I hope I get a lot done!

GOALS:

Marla, Book One

• Finish list of changes to be made
• Start going through ms and making and/or marking these changes

Song of the Prophecy

• Finish writing down ideas for changes (which I really should have done already!)
• Write the new first chapter and see how it turns out
• Write/revise more!

Wish me luck!

more changes than i thought

Well, I wrote notes about the changes to the magical system in Marla, Book One which led to thinking about plot concerns, which led to going through my scene outline (a must for anyone writing a novel!) and reminding myself of what happens in each one. This took a long time. The book is over 400 pages long. I only read a couple of scenes, skimmed a few, and scrolled down through most, but it still took awhile. This led to me seeing some problems I hadn't seen in my last revision, and seeing even more things that would need to be changed because of the changes I am making. Fortunately, I have no doubt that it will be a better book after I make these changes, unlike in Song of the Prophecy where I am still not sure.

Anyway, I will be cutting one of the major plot elements of the book because I think it was just a device to add more excitement and to fulfill certain plot necessities. Now I think the same ends will come about in a more natural way, stemming from some things that characters would naturally do. At least I hope so.

The changes I'm making will actually help with a lot of the characterization, however. I know these characters. They've been living with me for over ten years after all, although I'm not sure when these particular incarnations started to coalesce. And sometimes I know what they would feel and how they would react without there being a real reason for it. Or something. It's hard to explain. It's like I knew these ideas were coming before they came and the characters were reacting to something I hadn't written yet. Ok that makes no sense at all. I have better back story now. It makes more sense.

That's it. The back story! Before I knew the characters as they are when the book starts and had come up with some back story for them, but now the back story is a better fit for how the characters are when the story starts. Yes yes yes! That's what happened. My subconscious is more genius than I thought. =) j/k

I'm pleased with my progress, even though I've barely gotten started.

ideas, ideas and more ideas (part 2)

So I talked last week about having some ideas about my book Song of the Prophecy. What I didn't say was that about a month ago I had some ideas to make my very first novel, which doesn't currently have a title--I generally call it Marla, Book One, much better. I started writing it when I was around 14, and it was inspired by some of my favorite authors of the time. I've always been a little worried about it not being orginal enough. Well, I think I came up with some ideas that will make it much better. The world was a pretty general fantasy world, but with these new ideas I think the world will be much more interesting, but I won't have to change the plot that much. Obviously it will be a serious revision and I'll have to go through the whole thing, but it won't be a complete re-write. I'll be able to keep a lot of the bones.

Anyway, so I have all these ideas about Song of the Prophecy AND now I also have all these ideas about Marla, Book One and I'm excited about both of them, so I don't know which to start on.

I know. Isn't this a problem I'd like to have more often? I will think of it as an opportunity, not a problem.

ideas, ideas and more ideas

I have to admit that I was disappointed in the critiques I got from the contest. They weren't as detailed as I would have liked and some of the advice completely missed the mark. But any critique is only a tool for a writer. The person reading your manuscript never knows as much about your story as you do. More so in this case when they were only reading the first twenty-five pages. Often a critique is more useful for identifying problem areas than for figuring out how to fix them. Or a problem they mention may not be the actual problem, but something else is. Anyway, it's up to the author to figure all this out and make the book the best possible.

I found that even though I didn't get a lot of applicable adivce from the critiques, they did identify some possible problem areas, which got me thinking. Hence, the name of this entry. =)

I was hoping not to have to rewrite the beginning again because I've already reworked it several times. However, I think I may have to. Right now, each of the first three chapters (disregarding the prologue) focuses on a major character and their situation. They don't intersect until later (chapter 4 maybe?). Anyway, it's possible that this is too slow a beginning, although I like the idea of concentrating on some character development. I thought of a way to introduce all three characters in the framework of the current first chapter. I'll have to write it out and see how it works. It might be too much information and too many POV that early in the book. I wanted to have a big chunck of Mavelle right away because she's my protagonist, but that may not be possible. Although I could possible introduce the other characters without using their POV, it would just be harder to write. Again, I'll have to experiment some and see what works best.

I WON!

Remember that contest I entered my novel, Song of the Prophecy, in? Well, I won! I got first place in the science fiction & fantasy category. I have to say that I was thrilled. Now, I really have to finish editing the whole thing. They gave me a nice letter that I can include with my query letters that says I won the contest and that the judges thought I was great. I also got a certificate and $100.

More information about the contest and the group that sponsered it can be found at the Maryland Writer's Association Web site.

I also go two critiques, but I haven't read them yet because I'm a little afraid of what they might say. I glanced at them and saw some not so glowing comments. I have to remember that I won and not to take things so seriously.

Nine

Well, we've finished our run of Nine and it was an amazing experience! I met so many great people and I think I also evolved as an actress. Apparently I'm pretty funny. lol.

It was a lot of hard work (rehearsals just eat up your life towards the end) and I got sick towards the end and wasn't sure I'd be back into good singing form in time for opening night. I wasn't back to normal by then, but I could sing.

Anyway, it's been one of the best experiences I've had doing a show. I hope I'll be able to work with everyone again someday.

Next up: Urinetown in the fall. I'll be lucky if I get a part though, because I'm sure the competition will be really tough.

Stuck in the Apple Store

Literally. I'm so bored here! And yes, I know, it's been AGES since I updates. So sue me.

So, my computer has decided to be uncooporative again and I'm stuck here at the Apple Store waiting for my turn to talk to a "Genius." I have to say, they better be able to fix it. I've already had to come here 3 or 4 times since I got the thing, so my patience is wearing thin. Aren't macs supposed to be better than that? My applecare protection plan is almost up too. So at least it didn't decide to crap out on me after that. But this is bad timing. I'm going to the beach next week for a week. And I was planning on writing and working on my web page.

{Oh, by the way, I have a Web page now! It's at www.gaylegillespie.com}

Yes, I'll spend a lot of time reading and laying out on the beach and probably watching tv, but I still NEED my computer. I can't survive without it. Luckily it did let me get in long enough to backup some of my files, so I'm not going completely crazy, but it's still worrisome.

Anyway, it's finally my turn. Hopefully they can fix it!

I know it's been awhile

since my last post, but I've been pretty distracted. I got my entry into the writing contest I mentioned, so I'll be waiting to hear about that. I have no idea how long it will take.

I've started rehearsals for Nine and singing the music is awesome! They've put me on 1st soprano and I'm singing really high basically the whole show. It reminds me some of what I did in college. Not quite as hard, of course, but more difficult than anything I've sung since then.

The blocking and the dancing rehearsals have not been as fun, but that's only because they make me nervous. Really, I guess I'm not the stereotypical theater person. I took too long a break, that's what it is. Our director is wonderful though, and I'm sure I'll relax as I get to know people.

I've also been trying to revise my manuscript. I even joined the March Marathon organized by OWW. It hasn't been going so well. I've just been so tired recently that I haven't felt like doing anything after work, except going to rehearsal. But that's a required thing, kinda like going to work. I wouldn't go to work if I didn't have to. Still, I'm almost through to the end of Part II (aprox. half-way). Which isn't as impressive as it sounds because I didn't really do anything to Part I. These are structural rewrites. BIG things. I'm hoping I can get through Part II by the end of the week (and the marathon) and then I'll feel like I've accomplished something.

I think I've been thinking about it the wrong way anyway. When I was finishing writing the damn book, I kept saying, "I can do it. I can do it." And I did. Right now I'm thinking, "It's too much. It's too much. I don't think I can do it." Not the right attitude at all. Positive thinking!

I keep meaning to review all those books that I've read (that are on the side of my blog under "Reading," but it's been so long since I read some of them that I don't think I could do them justice. Hopefully, I'll be able to start that in the future.

I got cast!

I got a part in the musical Nine at Kensington Arts Theatre! It's a small part (not the one I specifically auditioned for), but I should get to sing in all the chorus numbers (8-9 songs or something like that) and be on stage for most of the show. My first rehearsal in Tuesday. The show opens May 19.

So now I'm going to be really busy, especially if I continue my plan to do the March writing (only I'll be revising) marathon with OWW. But busy is good! I always get more stuff done when I'm busy. It gives me less time to be depressed and wallow in self pity. :) I will have to work out a schedule. That will appeal to my anal side.

I'm hoping my friend who auditioned gets cast too, but she's up against someone else, so I don't know yet.

Went to auditions

I auditioned for the musical Nine with Kensington Arts Theatre tonight. I think it went pretty well. There were not a lot of people tonight, so unless a ton of awesome people show up tomorrow night (which is possible) I'm hopeful of my chances of getting a part and possibly even the part that I want, which is Claudia. However, I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much. I don't even know if I've gotten called back yet!

If I do get called back, those will be on Thursday. Another round of stuff to go through! groan. Hopefully, no more dancing, but that's possible. And spoken lines. eek!

Let's not get ahead of ourselves here. I should hear if I'm called back either Wednesday night or Thursday morning. Then if I'm cast in the show I'll probably hear on Saturday, but if I'm not cast I'll probably have to wait until Sunday to hear that.

Anyway, crossing my fingers.

Deadlines approach

Two deadlines are approaching and they're both stressing me out. Next week, I'll be auditioning for a show with local community theater. While I was in school, I didn't have time to do any theater as the rehearsal conflicted with my class schedule, but now that I've graduated, I have time again. But it's been about 2 yrs since I was in something. Auditions are stressful, and if I don't get in, I expect that I'll react badly.

The second is the post-mark deadline for the novel writing contest that I want to enter. The entry fee is $35 and the top prize is only $100. But they have a category for science fiction/fantasy/speculative and all entrants will apparently receive 2 judges critiques of their submissions. That's why I'm doing it. And since a book entered cannot be under contract to a publisher or an agent, it will help keep me from submitting to agents until I'm ready.

To enter, I need to get ready:
1. The first 25 pages of my novel (easy, that probably won't even include chapter 2)
2. A one-page DOUBLE SPACED synopsis (extremely difficult as my synopsis is 4 pages, double spaced, I'm afraid the story won't make much sense in a page.)
3. Novel summary in 40 words of less (I think of this more as a hook or pitch rather than summary--I have some ideas.)

If I happened to tie or advance to the final round to compete for the grand prize, they would read the last 25 pages of my manuscript. This is the part that worries me because even though my book is complete from beginning to end, it's not in final form and my # of pages will probably change. But they can't fault a writer for submitting her best work, right? And if inspiration strikes (which I'm sure it will me, since I'm actively trying to get it to do so) they can't blame her for changing the things that need changing?

Anyway, I doubt I have much of a chance to get that far. I really just want the critiques to help make my first pages and synopsis the best they can possibly be before I submit to agents.

I'll know probably by the end of next week if I'm in the show. It will be June before I know the results of the contest. I say to myself, "Break a leg!"

Melodramatic much?

Actually, I went back and read my rant about writing a synopsis and it's not as bad as I remembered. I remembered making a complete fool of myself. :-) But I guess I only really freaked out to a couple of my friends.

I have to admit that being melodramatic and overreacting to things is one of my...well, we'll call it one of my charms.

I was reading this page about rejections (a suggestion of Miss Snark's on her blog) and it got me to thinking about my rejections. I've gotten enough of them to be a little used to it and I generally try (unsuccessful, but I try) not to get my hopes up too much. Not matter how much you know that it's a long shot, it's always a shock to the system to get that rejection. It's really, really hard not to take it personally. Your writing is just so wrapped up with who you are, it's practically impossible not too.

A lot of people get angry, and I can't say that I don't, but I tend to shake it off pretty quickly. It's actually things like this synopsis critique or disappointing paper grade that will upset me more. Or not getting into a show I've auditioned for, that's just awful. I've been trying to get published for over ten years, so I've developed some thickness of skin in terms of rejection letters at least.

Watch me go compeltely beserk the first time I get a rejection from an agent for this book.

At least whatever happens, I can count on myself NOT to write a nasty note to an agent. An ex-boyfriend...been there done that...an agent? No.

Snowed In!

We got over a foot of snow! Down on my little cul-de-sac I doubt we'll get plowed out by tonight at the earliest. Still don't know if I'll have to go to work tomorrow, but the public schools will probably be cancelled. The questions becomes if the colleges and universities will be as well?

Sadly, the terps lost their game yesterday. But they played with heart.

And I am very discouraged. No one likes my synopsis. And I feel very overwhelmed about my manuscript. I guess the difference between me now and when I revised my last book is that now I understand how much work it will be and I have a better concept of how much work it actually needs. And I haven't even gotten to the really rough part yet!

School spoiled me, I guess. I could only realistically work on short chunks of my book and I wrote too many short stories. But as I learned writing IS revision. And I always like this part before. I'm thinking too much in terms of the big picture. I just need to get through his read through. Then I can start doing one thing at a time.

I can do this right? No matter what people think of my synopsis. I know the story is good; the world is even better. They both need to be excellent.

Mavelle (my main character) often says, "If I can just keeping singing..."

If I can just keep working...

Writing a synopsis sucks!

<>

Have you ever tried to sum up a novel that is 150,000 words in less than a page (about 500 words)? Well, it's awful. Apparently I've cut so much out (including even mentioning 3 POV characters) that there doesn't appear to be enough conflict to keep a novel going! That comment made me laugh in a kind of despairing way. There is certainly enough conflict to last for a whole novel (I wouldn't have been able to write the whole thing if there hadn't been, the problem is conveying that in such a limited space without overwhelming the reader (i.e. agent) with a list of confusing events.

Of course i could make the synopsis longer, but I really wanted to keep it below a page. And I'm entering a novel contest that requires a double-spaced synopsis of a page or less. Are they INSANE? That's more like jacket cover copy. sigh.

So maybe I should readjust my thinking a allow myself two pages, at least for the synopsis that I'll be sending out to agents. I have to get into more of Tavin's motivation, and even some more of Mavelle's, or otherwise the events don't matter, right? But I also have to get in more about all the obstacles they face, which are plenty and I still have to keep at least information about the world. One person wanted more about the gods. And the Mother and the Destroyer are so hard to explain, especially since I don't even know if I'm doing it well in the book!

It's IMPOSSIBLE!!!

< /vent >

On a better note: i did start reading my manuscript over last night during and after the opening ceremonies to the Olympics. I'm just trying to refresh everything in my mind and spot major structural and/or tension problems. The good news is that the first part of the book still reads well to me (this is the part that was included in my book for school and has been gone over a lot) but since that's the part I'm most familiar with, I may not be distant enough from it. But on the whole I think it's tight and polished.

The second part is more troublesome. I have to rewrite the early Amaris scenes to reflect the change in the character. And there is a huge drop in tension between when Mavelle leaves Felice and when she gets to the next place she sings. HUGE HUGE drop in tension. So that obviously needs to be fixed. And that is where the two preti I may be including into one character are introduced so that all might need to be worked out as well. And that's as far as I got. About 150 pages into the ms. Not bad.

We might get lots of snow here, so there is a slight possibility that I might get a day off on Monday, but that's probably being too hopeful. It would be nice though to have another day to read it.

Maryland bball game today: GO TERPS!!! Show those Dukies they should FEAR THE TURTLE!
Ok, it's a long shot to win, but it would be awesome.

Inspiration from the mental stew

So, I haven't started looking at my manuscript yet. Yes, I know I said I would, but I haven't. Still, it isn't a bad thing for me to let it breathe for awhile. It's been stewing in my mind and inspiration has struck!

While working on my synopsis, I realized that events need to be tightened. At one point Amaris, who is a cantella trying to save people from the Destroyer before Mavelle gets there, is found and led to a hidden city. This woman is a servant of the force that eventually helps Mavelle. Then later Amaris runs into Mavelle and that's how Mavelle gets to the city. Well, I thought, that's just too convenient. Tavin is already having these dreams earlier in the book, I should use them to lead Mavelle where she needs to go. I can cut the scenes where Amaris goes ahead. She can still meet Mavelle and Tavin at the same point, but I'll have to rework some of what she's doing before then. Anyway, once I figure it all out, it should be a tighter story, but there will have to be some reworking.

The other thing I thought of was the awkwardness of some of the revelations that come to Mavelle. I think if Wilhenn, the expert in everything the Order knows about the cataclysm and what life was like before, was given enough clues, he could help put things together. For example, the keeper of the spiral, might not only be guarding the spiral but other things, such as a book, or fragments, things in a language that they have forgotten how to read, but Wilhenn might be able to. Anyway, it's a thought.

Probably the most difficult thing about my story is explaining all the stuff that the characters don't know, but need to find out. I guess I need to thing about exactly what they DO need to know and what they don't.

On a side note: I am reading Sebastian by Anne Bishop because she is one of Jennifer Jackson's clients. I haven't gotten very far yet, but I am disappointed to see that there is a force in the story's world called "The Eater of the World" who is escaping from a prison. This is unfortunately similar to my Destroyer who is escaping from his prison and has an army of Eaten. sigh. There is even the concept of something being divided. In this case The Light and The Dark. In my case The Mother and the Destroyer. Well, I'll just have to hope all the OTHER stuff in my book is original enough in concept or combination.

Revision Goals

My mind is already spinning with all the things I need to do to fix my manuscript, and there are many. Right now I'm mainly thinking of big things like combining characters, adding a character, fixing a subplot. I'll think about smaller things like adding more description, avoiding the passive voice and not repeating information to the reader later.

1. Combine the characters of Wilhenn and Jorrniss. Wilhenn's character is to provide conflict; he is someone who causes trouble for Mavelle. Jorrniss's main purpose is to provide information, though he also helps Mavelle deal with Wilhenn. I think one character can perform both these roles and also be more interesting. If Wilhenn doesn't like Mavelle, doesn't believe in her, it will be MORE interesting for him to end up being the one to provide so much useful information.

2. Figure out what to do about the gods. In earlier drafts of my manuscript, there are "interludes" from the gods' POV in which they discuss their plans. These are very short and most readers disliked them. I stopped using them for the last 2/3 of the novel and am not sure they would fit as well there anyway. But without the Interludes, I feel the first part of the book is lacking something. Also the purpose and actions of the gods become more inscrutable to the reader without them. If I bring Benny's POV up earlier in the novel this could help take care of this, BUT I'd need to someone work in the gods into conversations with his brother. I'm not sure about this. Perhaps it is enough for Mavelle to be thinking about the purpose of the gods' actions?

3. Expand on the sections of Benny's POV and move them closer to the beginning of the novel. I need to introduce the character of Lovak in these sections and develop Chera's character more early as she becomes more important later, more important than i thought she'd be.

4. The earlier scenes from Amaris's POV need to be reworked some to make her sound older, more confident and drop hints about what could otherwise be an unfair surprise later.

5. Mavelle's relationship with Tavin needs to be worked on. I think I can build tension without being so explicit early on. It will bring more impact to the scene where they finally get together if there aren't so many make-out scenes earlier. I'm definitely keeping the one in the cave however.

6. I think Rylin will be more effective if I introduce him later and make him Chera's husband rather than her brother. That way I can take him out of the Sharlis incident and clean that whole sequence up some. I think he can be introduced in Hydrelt instead. He will have been pestering the cantellissima there for help and either she can bring him and Mavelle together or it can come as a surprise.

7. Bea's character needs to be move developed. After she serves her purpose I kind of drop her. If that's all she's good for, I should find out some other way to do it and cut her. Otherwise she needs a more important role in the end.

8. Georth needs to be more developed as well, I think.

9. There is a dip in tension between when they reach Hydrelt and they flee for the hidden city. I think this will be helped by introducing Rylin later, but I need to make sure the story keeps moving here.

10. The other men from Brom need to be move developed so when they die it is more painful. I'm not sure how I will do this, but it needs to be done.

I'm sure there are many other things that I will think of, but this is plenty enough for me to start with. All right, my plan of attack. I'm going to read through the whole manuscript, noting places where I can do some of these things and other places where the tension is low or there are problems, without actually stopping to fix them. Once I have done that read through, then I will go through and work on all these things.

There we go. Time to get started.

So what's your book about anyway?

I started writing the next post about all the things I need to do to revise my manuscript and realized that absolutely none of it would make sense unless I first gave at least an overview of what my book is about. Well, here is the pitch paragraph of my query to agents (that I can hopefully send out soon!):

SONG OF THE PROPHECY is set in a world where the gods have demanded exorbitant amounts of sacrifice for hundreds of years, causing devastating natural disasters when they don’t get what they want. Only the cantelli, women with power in their voices, have been able to keep the gods from wreaking complete havoc. When a mysterious god starts demanding human sacrifice, the cantella Mavelle is told that she is the one prophesized to defeat him. Despite the wealth being a cantella has brought her, Mavelle longs for a normal life. With her desire for freedom eating at her willpower and her voice her only weapon, will she be able to destroy a god?

On her journey Mavelle fights the gods, falls in love, discovers an ancient power and makes some sacrifices of her own. I don't want to give too much way here. I want everyone to read the whole thing when it's published. *crosses fingers* The synopsis that I'm having a horrible time with will give away the ending, of course, because that's what agents want.

Feel free to comment and let me know what you'd do if you were an agent. Would you request a partial manscript from me?

I'M FINISHED!!

I've finished writing the 1st draft of my book!! I'm so happy. Finally. Finally. It's been so long since I finished one, I've forgotten how good it feels.

Now I just have to revise the whole thing. At least the first six or so chapters are in pretty polished condition. That's something at least. (And the part I'll be sending out to agents!)

But enough thinking about that. I'm getting ahead of myself. Now is the time to celebrate. Well, first to sleep. and then to celebrate. whoo hoo!

Anyway, here's my stats:

genre: fantasy (of course--what else is there? j/k)
Time from original germ of an idea: 10+ years
Time from serious start on manuscript: approx. 2 years, 5 months
Length in page: 491
Length in words: about 150,000

Whoo hooo!

Writer's Block

Actually I don't believe in "writer's block" in the way people traditionally define it. At least not for me. I believe that other people believe in it and I suppose I should feel more sympathetic towards them, but most of the time when I'm going through something like writer's block it's more out of sheer laziness on my part than anything else and I assume if a writer really buckled down, they'd get over it.

However. That is not to say that I don't get clogged now and then. And this I am sympathetic about, because I feel it always stems from a reason. And if you look at that reason, you can unclog yourself and start writing again. There are two types of clogs: idea clogs and flow clogs.

Idea clogs happen when you can't think of anything to write about. I would suggest that you have an idea before you sit down to write, coming up with one on the spot can indeed be difficult. The trick is to be sponge. Open yourself to material while you are reading, watching TV, listening to the radio, talking to your friends and family. Soak it all in and if you have the glimmer of an idea, ANY idea, WRITE IT DOWN. It doesn't have to be good now, you just don't want to forget that you had it. The act of writing it down will reinforce it in your memory and while it's there in your head it will bump and mingle with all the other ideas you have and eventually when you need to squeeze something out ideas will come.

Or if this doesn't work and you still have trouble thinking of ideas, there are all sorts of writing prompts that you can use. Or you can pick some technique a favorite author uses and try and imitate it, starting with the technique first rather than an "idea."

This probably isn't very helpful, because I don't usually have a problem with ideas. I have more fantasy novels in my head than I'll probably be able to write in a lifetime.

The other type of clog is the flow clog. This happens to me a lot. It's happening to me right now actually. This is what happens when you are writing something and for some reason you lose the thread or the spark and it stops flowing. For me this state results from one of two things. Either I have just lost focus and/or are avoiding writing for some reason that has nothing to with the story at all or there is something wrong with what I have written before or what I am planning on writing that my subconscious recognizes needs to be fixed before I continue. Sometimes if I identify to myself what the problem is and promise to fix it later, I can continue. Sometimes I can't.

This is where strength of will comes in. If it is a lack of focus, I just have to buckle down and do it. If I sit in front of the computer for two hours and actually try to write, word WILL come, probably close to 2,000 of them, it it's a work in progress, but if I don't give myself that time because I'm not focused the words don't have a chance. If it's a problem I see, there may be something to letting my subconscious stew on the problem for awhile, but eventually, I have to again actually sit down and focus on what the problem is.

Writing is hard. Anyone who doesn't think so hasn't tried it. But blaming lack of progress on "writer's block" instead of taking responsibility for your process, will not help you move forward. Identify what kind of clog you have and start plunging! Take control of your writing. It might be slow at first, but eventually, the flow will come back.

I had New Year's resolutions...

but I'm not sure what happened to them. Ok, so I'm still on my diet, but this is only my second week. It's too soon to tell if I'll really be able to stick with it. But I paid for 3 months of the Weight Watchers online service, so hopefully... And anyway, I like putting in the numbers.

My other one (and more important than losing weight) was to finish my book. Have I done anything about that? No.

My third one was to keep saving money so I can move out.

And I also want to do theater again, but I don't think that one was ever official. I think I just assumed that would happen on its own. But I had the chance to audition for a show this week and I didn't. The fact that I didn't really have a song ready is not a good enough excuse, because I SHOULD have had a song ready.

Graduating has not given me the satisfaction I thought it would. It was my focus, especially this final semester after my boyfriend and I broke up. Now, I feel like I have no focus.

I should have focus. I want to finish my book and send it out to agents, right? Yes, but once I do they might reject it. I've been trying to do this (get published) for awhile now and after submitting my first book, I thought I developed a thicker skin. I'm afraid now that this is not the case. This is my most original and best written (at least it will be after I edit it) book. If this doesn't get accepted, I don't know that anything I write ever will.

But I won't know until I try right? Can't live life without taking risks, without opening myself up for being hurt. That wouldn't be living. I have to remember that.